You’re getting married! While you’re looking forward to the party (and spending the rest of your days with the love of your life, of course), you know you’re in for several bumpy months before you get to the fun part. The next year or so will be full of questions about which paper to use for your invitations, demands about what you wear, and never-ending to-do lists. Here are 12 things every groom REALLY thinks about the wedding planning process…

1. Don’t worry. I’ll take care of ____ [planning the music/selecting the food/mailing the invitations].

2. Um, why does our apartment look like an elementary school art class?

3. So…you’re TRYING to look like a mermaid?

4. What the hell is a Pantone?

5. Nope. I will NOT wear that ______ [cummerbund/matching t-shirt/crazy boutonniere].

6. How many people are we inviting?! I don’t even know that many people…

7. You mean I actaully have to ASK my friends to be groomsmen?

8. Wait…we can register for a TV?!

9. No offense, but I just don’t care about _____ [the stationary/the flowers/choreographing our first dance].

10. Oh, good. Your mom/sister/BFF is calling again.

11. Time for the BACHELOR PARTY!

12. We NEED a cool getaway car.

—By Claire Aven